Hello, this is all new to me, and i doubt any one cares, but i hope to show those who arnt social outcasts what its like to be shy and timid. but first to give some knowledge about what made me this way.

-born December 22, 1994

-at age 2 i lost my one and only brother, to this day i have no idea what he looks like.

-at age 4 started martial arts

-when i was 5 started at local kindergarten- had no friends

-age 7: told i had ADHD. a problem to this day

-at age 8 parents put me in privet school

i was shy from birth, but what i went through at privet school screwed me up. i was in multiple fights, most of which they attacked me because i wasn't scared by them. some of the things that follow explain why i have trust issues, and with very good reason.

-4th and 5th grade my teacher was Mr. smith

-6th grade- only male, started learning German from Mr. smith

-7th grade- LVR trip, only male in 7th and bullied at school, was persecuted by 6th graders and the other school that was there. still no friends. last quarter at the school, Mr. Smith convicted of child molestation charges, and had over 20gigs of child pornography on his computer. My favorite teacher/principle (yeah that small of school) Resigned from his post after details of Mr. Smiths employment came to surface. Mr. Smith had not been background checked. Last quarter of schooling done under a sub. she had no degree, the only thing she had done as a teacher was for Sunday school.

-8th grade. First day of pubic school. 2 months in, already had some one threaten to kill me for hitting on his girlfriend. i didnt even know her name... bullied non stop.

-9th grade. finally a friend... that thinks its funny to make fun of me. at least he backed me up when someone else bullied me. first real crush.

-10th grade. first day in highschool. had first kiss, first dance, and first breakup. and thats just in October. February 6, 2011. the day the one person i thought that loved me. heart attack, dad loses job, grades slip. first car wreck. no one hurt. and i quit wrestling. shit hit the fan.

-11th grade year, first real girlfriend , have to go to sip every day because of bad grades for last year. finds out i have a spinal injury and kicked of swimming team for said injury. dad gets new job, then a pothead totals my dads truck(1977 Gmc-aka giant chunk of steel) and crashes into mine. car shopping. find a used 1994 ford mustang, red. hydroplanned into truck, ships my paint, causes "500" dollers of damage to him, i wasnt even going 15mlh. 

thats pretty much the story of my life... well most of it any way. there is no feeling in this, but try to picture you having no one who likes you, no friends, parents that dont care (Dad still dosnt know my full name, and the first is the only one that changed...) and then add the stress of not knowing if your ready for the real world, a breakup with the one person not your now dead grandma you thought that had some feelings for. and thats how i feel. i think i am ugly, have 1 friend, and is one of the few people in the school that knows how to think,book wise and sorta street wise.